The last time I wrote about Shaandar, I spoke about the character played by newcomer Sannah Kapoor. She was a "fat" girl, who was mocked because of it and who had no plans of bringing her weight down. There is a lot of fat shaming in the movie and of course, there are characters in the movie who tell Sannah (whatever her on-screen name was) that it is okay to be fat. In one scene, her mother brings her a three-tiered plate full of chocolates and asks her to finish it. Now this girl, who is also a would-be bride, is totally comfortable being how she is. And maybe that's what made her so endearing. But there are a whole lot of girls who are fat shamed and not all of them are okay with it.
Being "beautiful" was a cruel but simple concept up until now.Put together fair, thin and sharp features and you have got a gorgeous girl! These days, however, I come across a lot of words like "body-positivity" and "being comfortable in one's own skin". It is a good movement. It is definitely a revolution and it will be a long time, a really really long time before people change their perception of what "beautiful" is. But before we start accepting a rather wider definition or an ambiguous explanation of what beauty is, I hope people stop being hypocritical about it. Here is why I say so.
Dum laga ke haisha was an unexpectedly sweet release this year. It spoke of a girl called Sandhya who is over-weight. But she is smart, funny, feisty and talented. She gets married to a guy who agrees to the alliance under family pressure but is not happy with it, obviously because his wife is "fat". Watch the movie if you still haven't. But here's the deal. The girl playing Sandhya, actress Bhumi Penderkar, is now thinner -- way thinner than what she was in the movie. This is after she came out of the role in her interviews declaring that she has always been okay with her body. But then why the sudden weight change? Because she has a three-film deal with Yashraj? Why couldn't she continue having a three-film deal with the body that she already had? I don't know the complete story here but what I can understand (and I may be wrong) is this -- she, like many others, have succumbed to the set beauty standards. And it is okay! Because being overweight has its own obvious demerit. But then why go harping about "being overweight is okay" and parallelly do the opposite of it? It sends out confusing signals and like it or not, people do look up to movie actors as their role models. So here is what I am saying --Please let's admit it first -- We are not accepting towards "fat" people. Of course, being fit is different. What many people don't understand is that there are body types and each body behaves differently. All we "see" or "appreciate" is lean, thin, six packs, hour-glass, and the works. And we really, really need to change this thinking. Because people are much more than the extra layer of fat on their bodies.
Ok, maybe let's spare the film industry. Those guys are paid to look good and they have tons of resources and money at their disposal to change their bodies. Coming a bit closer to real life, being fat or being dark-skinned in India is considered a sin. I have heard educated, elderly people talking this about girls, "It is going to be very difficult finding her a groom, She is not pretty." And it is kind of funny because not every second person you meet is an Aishwarya Rai or a Hugh Grant. Most of us, almost all of us are flawed in some way or the other. I have been very vocal about how unhappy I am about my dark circles (although I have started accepting them only now) Or how my nose is slightly twisted (the reason why I avoid smiling ear to ear in my pictures)
Of course, we all are suckers for beauty. It is only human. We get attracted to dishes that look pretty, Tourist destination with natural beauty is more popular than maybe a debris with major historical importance. But when it comes to living, breathing, thinking, talking, feeling human beings, I wish we could be a bit more sensitive and a bit more clear first. I started accepting the "flawed is beautiful" theory only after I admitted to myself that all these years, I have been adhering to a certain parameter of beauty and why not? We have been conditioned over years. Tun-tun was a funny caricature in older movies. Villains always have black skin and broken teeth. Heroes are always handsome and heroines always have big eyes and an hour glass figure. Forget movies, even in real life, we make character judgments only on the basis of how a person looks.
We need to look beyond. I need to look beyond and I am trying. Every time I see someone on the streets who is flawed in a very obvious way, immediately I have an opinion about them. But then I ask myself -- maybe they are far better writers or coders or maybe they can solve a Rubik's cube in under a minute. Maybe they are brilliant dancers or maybe they are fantastic orators. Who am I to say? Who am I to know or judge without really knowing them as a human being? And that's what's really required. Being good to fellow humans, irrespective of looks, weight, cast, creed, country, occupation -- isn't it?
